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When To Have Sex: Which “Side” of You Decides?

Posted on November 17, 2016 by delaine No Comments
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Originally published in 2011 As my divorced friend Ashley filled me in on a first date she’d just come back from, she was practically squealing.  Not only was her date funny, intelligent and very much a gentleman, she was super physically attracted to him.  “I kept reminding myself to stop staring at his chest,” she […]

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First Time Without Kids: “My heart is so heavy”

Posted on November 17, 2016 by delaine No Comments
ex takes kids divorced mom

From the archives: Three years post-divorce, 2011 I received this message from a newly-separated woman on Facebook today: “My ex-husband took the kids for the first time this weekend….and my heart feels so heavy. My “free time” just reminds me how alone and directionless I am.” I read her message with a tight chest:  I remember… Three […]

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Can Going Without Sex Become A “Bad Habit” After Divorce?

Posted on November 16, 2016 by delaine No Comments
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I was standing beside a divorced soccer mom, watching our kids’ game, when she suddenly blurted: “Do you realize I haven’t had sex in over three years?” I turned to her, mouth open. “You’ve got to be joking.” She shook her head. “No… I’m afraid not.” “But how? Why? Look at you — you’re gorgeous…hot!  And […]

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“Edging” – An Amazing Sexual Technique That Makes Women Go Wild

Posted on November 8, 2016 by delaine No Comments
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Men, have you heard of the term “edging” before?  Do you want your woman to experience the most earth-shattering orgasms of her life, and look at you with stars in her eyes? Then make sure you are well-versed and practiced at “edging.” Edging is an artful technique that involves a man (or woman) bringing his/her partner […]

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How would you respond to, “I’m looking for a sugarbaby”?

Posted on November 8, 2016 by delaine No Comments
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Imagine this: You’re in your late thirties, divorced, broke, and trying to singlehandedly raise your children while you go to school full-time. Suddenly, the most unexpected offer literally lands on your table — an “indecent proposal” by a wealthy stranger. Reserve judgment until you read the full article here on The Huffington Post.  

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Anger & Bitterness: Have Your Walls Become Your Prison Since Divorcing?

Posted on November 2, 2016 by delaine No Comments
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Written during Year Three post-divorce; 2011 Do you ever wonder if you’ve become “hardened” as a result of your divorce? By “hardened”, I don’t mean “stronger.”  I mean “encased in bitterness and distrust” towards the opposite sex. Cause it happened to me — and I didn’t even realize it.  In fact, to this very day, […]

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The Value of a Sharp, No-Bullsh** Girlfriend & Mentor During Divorce

Posted on October 31, 2016 by delaine No Comments
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  Sharp.  Astute.  A woman with a “no bullshit” attitude. This is the kind of mentor/girlfriend I believe all divorcing women need in their corner during a divorce.  Let me qualify that by saying it’s not the only kind of friend we need. We need those who make us laugh and forget, those who are […]

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“MINE” — A Shiver-Inducing Snapshot of the D/s Dynamic (Dominance & submission)

Posted on October 29, 2016 by delaine No Comments
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I LOVE this video.  I really really love it, and I’ve watched it probably 50 times over the past two years. In my opinion, this work by Alvaro de la Herran for GQ Spain, beautifully captures the beauty and eroticism of the D/s connection and dynamic — much more so than anything  portrayed in the […]

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Stockings & Corsets & Stilettos, Oh My! Halloween Can Help Couples & Divorced Women Own Their “SEXY”!

Posted on October 28, 2016 by delaine 2 Comments
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Here’s a question for you ladies — ALL of you ladies, whether you’re divorced, single or partnered: When was the last time you took the time to REALLY sexy yourself up? I don’t mean “look pretty.”  I mean SEXY.  I mean wearing the kind of outfit and undergarments that make you half-giggle (for the audacity) but […]

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Are You Dating Another Version of Your Ex?

Posted on October 28, 2016 by delaine 1 Comment
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Are you dating someone since divorcing who’s bringing you down?  Are you ignoring the warning signs that this person is  WAY too much work — kind of like your ex-husband/ex-wife was?  Has it ever crossed your mind that perhaps you’re so programmed to putting out relationship fires and compromising who you are and what you […]

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Financial Domination: An Unusual But Very Real Fetish

Posted on October 27, 2016 by delaine 5 Comments
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This past week, my friend Deanne was chatting at length with a younger man on a dating site when he suddenly hit her with an “unusual” request:  “Every month I’d like to give you money,“ he wrote.  “You can spend it on yourself or any way you want.  We can start out small but maybe […]

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On Becoming A “Woman With A History”

Posted on October 27, 2016 by delaine 1 Comment
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There’s a powerful feeling growing beneath my skin.  It’s been pushing through me and into my consciousness over the past year.  It speaks of love, sorrow, adventure, and intensity. It stems from having shared, loved, believed, lost, marrying, giving birth, trying again, trying harder, aching and celebrating. It speaks of gradual surrender and letting go, […]

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Revenge, Retribution & Compensation: Black Box – The Gift of Betrayal

Posted on October 27, 2016 by delaine 5 Comments
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Black Box — The Gift of Betrayal: A Q & A with author COLLEEN SHANA “You’ve fucked with my husband, Skank. Now, it’s time to fuck with me.” Author Colleen Shana grins and shakes her head as she reads this line from her new book, Black Box, The Gift of Betrayal.  “I know, I know…  My […]

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Travelling Spouse: Prevent Your Relationship From Nose-Diving

Posted on October 27, 2016 by delaine 1 Comment
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  When a spouse regularly works out of town, his (or her) return trips home usually spell stress and chaos on the home front.  Over time, resentment can easily grow around issues like downtime, chores, parenting and (lack of) sex.  Here are some tips and insights to keep your relationship on track. Downtime: He needs […]

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Wallet Size: Does It Matter To You When You Date?

Posted on October 26, 2016 by delaine No Comments
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I know the topic of this blog post is contentious and uncomfortable. Nonetheless, I’m fielding these questions anyway:  Does a man’s financial wealth or lack thereof influence your decision to date him or not? Or do you classify this as gold-digging, and find it shallow, offensive, and demeaning to the concept of true love? I decided to ask […]

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She Grew Balls & Confronted His Mistress to Find ANSWERS

Posted on October 26, 2016 by delaine 1 Comment
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When Fiona picked up the phone in the middle of the night to a drunk woman’s voice, asking for her husband, the situation didn’t register at first: she was half-asleep, half out of it. But all of a sudden, her brain went crystal clear.  Heart was pounding. “Who are you?” Fiona asked. “Why are you calling […]

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Role Reversal: “Baby, This is Sex, Not Love”

Posted on October 26, 2016 by delaine 2 Comments
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We enjoyed each other’s bodies for hours that night.  And the sex was as magnificent and fulfilling as it was the previous five times we’d lain together: intense, passionate, consuming and totally stress-busting! But afterwards, as I lay cuddled into his chest, eyes closed, brain floating off in Post-Orgasmic Wonderland,  I suddenly heard:  “I love you, […]

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Three Couples Dealing With Sexless Marriages

Posted on October 26, 2016 by delaine 1 Comment
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In our sex-obsessed culture — where everyone seems to be wanting some, getting some, or sneaking some on the side — it may surprise you to know that an estimated 10 – 15 per cent of married couples are sexless (defined by less than 10 times per year).   A further 5 per cent have no […]

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Remember: You Are NOT Your “Story”; Dating After Divorce

Posted on October 25, 2016 by delaine 2 Comments
identity crisis divorce, dating, how to date after divorcing

My divorced girlfriend Marie was heading out on a date —  a fourth date, which was a super big deal to her. But as we spoke beforehand over the phone, she was practically in a tizzy: “I really do like this guy, Delaine. But the timing is completely horrid. My life is a a total mess and […]

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It’s Sometimes Hard to Be Present With The Children During Divorce

Posted on October 25, 2016 by delaine 1 Comment
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Like most parents, I love my kids more than life itself.  And since I got divorced, I’ve worked really hard to make sure that they not just adjusted, but thrived. But I’m human…far from perfect.  And sometimes life circumstances have gotten the best of me or worn me down. Consequently, my children have seen me crying. They’ve […]

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