Category: Single Mom

When To Have Sex: Which “Side” of You Decides?

Posted on 11/17/16 by delaine
dating sex after divorce , 30s, 40s, 50s. best blog

Originally published in 2011 As my divorced friend Ashley filled me in on a first date she’d just come back from, she was practically squealing.  Not only was her date funny, intelligent and very much a gentleman, she was super physically attracted to him.  “I kept reminding myself to stop staring at his chest,” she […]

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First Time Without Kids: “My heart is so heavy”

Posted on 11/17/16 by delaine
ex takes kids divorced mom

From the archives: Three years post-divorce, 2011 I received this message from a newly-separated woman on Facebook today: “My ex-husband took the kids for the first time this weekend….and my heart feels so heavy. My “free time” just reminds me how alone and directionless I am.” I read her message with a tight chest:  I remember… Three […]

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Can Going Without Sex Become A “Bad Habit” After Divorce?

Posted on 11/16/16 by delaine
go without sex, when to have sex. early to have sex help divorce

I was standing beside a divorced soccer mom, watching our kids’ game, when she suddenly blurted: “Do you realize I haven’t had sex in over three years?” I turned to her, mouth open. “You’ve got to be joking.” She shook her head. “No… I’m afraid not.” “But how? Why? Look at you — you’re gorgeous…hot!  And […]

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How would you respond to, “I’m looking for a sugarbaby”?

Posted on 11/08/16 by delaine
sugarbaby, mistress, dull-time student, divorced mom

Imagine this: You’re in your late thirties, divorced, broke, and trying to singlehandedly raise your children while you go to school full-time. Suddenly, the most unexpected offer literally lands on your table — an “indecent proposal” by a wealthy stranger. Reserve judgment until you read the full article here on The Huffington Post.  

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Role Reversal: “Baby, This is Sex, Not Love”

Posted on 10/26/16 by delaine
I love you to early, divorced mom, when to say I love you

We enjoyed each other’s bodies for hours that night.  And the sex was as magnificent and fulfilling as it was the previous five times we’d lain together: intense, passionate, consuming and totally stress-busting! But afterwards, as I lay cuddled into his chest, eyes closed, brain floating off in Post-Orgasmic Wonderland,  I suddenly heard:  “I love you, […]

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It’s Sometimes Hard to Be Present With The Children During Divorce

Posted on 10/25/16 by delaine
trying to stay present with kids, parenting after divorce, exhausted parent

Like most parents, I love my kids more than life itself.  And since I got divorced, I’ve worked really hard to make sure that they not just adjusted, but thrived. But I’m human…far from perfect.  And sometimes life circumstances have gotten the best of me or worn me down. Consequently, my children have seen me crying. They’ve […]

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Fee Assistance For Divorced Moms & Dads During Tough Economic Times

Posted on 10/25/16 by delaine
need money, financial help, single mom, calgary, kids sports, family activities

Has your divorced family fallen into harsh financial circumstances?  Are you fretting that your kids will miss out on important activities like sports, day camps, trips to the science center/zoo, because you simply don’t have the money?  You aren’t alone….especially here in Calgary, Alberta, where I live, and an estimated one in nine adults are out […]

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Getting Naked For The First Time After Divorce

Posted on 10/24/16 by delaine
performance issues, first time naked, sex

After being with same person for many years, the idea of having sex with someone new can feel both exciting and downright terrifying — almost as much as losing your virginity!  But rest assured, your fears and jitters are normal and common.  Let’s climb on top of them right now. Fear: “But I’m older, saggier and […]

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Unfortunately, An Ex Sometimes Requires The Strong Arm of the Law to Behave

Posted on 10/23/16 by delaine
legal action, divorce. ex pay child spousal support

Dealing with an ex can sometimes feel like dealing with a child: You give and give and give — you explain things kindly over and over again. Yet still he/she doesn’t get it.  And although it’s unfortunate and not at all what we want to do, sometimes we need to take legal action in order […]

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Are Child Predators Online Going After Single Moms?

Posted on 10/21/16 by delaine
online child predators, dangers divorce dating,

Archives: 2009 When I first started online dating after my divorce, it was my biggest fear: that a child predator would pretend to be interested in me so that he could go after my children.  And today, even though I’m way more comfortable with internet dating, AND, I’ve yet to introduced any man to my […]

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Two Years Post-Divorce: Am I Forsaking Love to “Prove” Something?

Posted on 10/16/16 by delaine
divorced woman, wonder, forsake love, independent, hurt

  From the archives of I am Divorced Not Dead.com : originally posted in 2009 “You’ve proven that you don’t need a man, Dee,” said my best friend Hali as she put down her wine glass on the restaurant table.  “What I want to know is when are you going to stop proving it?” I […]

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Screw Him! He Didn’t Want to Get Serious Because I Have Three Kids

Posted on 09/21/16 by delaine
dating after divorce, screw him, not good enough, didn't want to date because I have kids

From the archives of I Am Divorced Not Dead: Originally published in 2010 I broke up with a man a few days ago – a single father of two children.   He’s the first man I’ve gone out with since divorcing that I contemplated getting serious with whatsoever.  But even though we got along brilliantly, even though he […]

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What If The New Boyfriend Wants to Have a Child of His Own?

Posted on 02/21/16 by delaine
boyfriend wants baby, divorce choices, tough question

From the archives of I am Divorced Not Dead: Originally posted in 2009; fresh to divorce! While I was married, I gave birth to three kids in three years and I can honestly say their early years are a blur to me; life was CRAZY.  And since divorcing, I’ve sworn I wouldn’t have another child. “My […]

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Telling Your Ex-Husband (or Ex-Wife) You Have A New Partner

Posted on 10/15/15 by delaine
how to tell ex-husband about new partner, freak out, should I tell my ex-wife

In my work as a divorce coach, it saddens me how often separated or divorced parents refuse to tell each other when they have a serious new partner in their lives. Oftentimes, it’s not until their child says something, or a friend/family member speaks up, that the unknowing ex finds out.  That, or the new […]

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Naked Before The World... In a Lifetime Movie!

Posted on 09/20/14 by delaine
dee-book-high-res

When I was going through the absolute hell of divorce and infidelity, I remember people offered supportive words like, “Hang in there, things will get better” and “You never know what great things might lay around the corner.” But my God, my God, my God (shaking head)…I never imagined my road would eventually lead to […]

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